A great little story

I read the whole paper today and my brain keeps trailing back to one small but charming piece that you all ought to read. Tom Gorman of the Las Vegas Sun profiles a couple who work at Caesars Palace and have become herb suppliers to Bradley Ogden and several other restaurants. There's just something lovely and very Las Vegasy about this little story. It really belonged on the front page instead of a tedious rehash of the long-since-quieted mob museum kerfluffle.

And speaking of front-page news today, the R-J decided to go huge with the silliness about Mojave Max v. Punxsutawney Phil. It was the top local story! I know from the comments on this post from yesterday that some of you find this matter charming and me a cynic for noting that it's a cheap publicity stunt in a city that doesn't really need them when we're treating lesbolicious kissing contests as legitimate business pursuits. But do you think it's the most important local news story of the day? Really?

Why should the herb-growers get front-page treatment and not the sleepy turtle? Well, for one thing the front page of the Las Vegas Sun is really just the front of a section of the R-J and frequently offers up a quirky human-interest bit. So it's not endowing the topic with undue significance the way the front of the R-J does. And for another, it's a turtle that predicts weather in a city in which weather is essentially the same for months on end. So it's a turtle that doesn't actually do anything useful for anyone. The herb-growers, on the other hand, do.

Are you kidding?

Some mornings I don't have any idea what to blog. There was nothing of particular interest in the weekend papers -- mostly it was a lot of conjecture about the coming legislative session -- and I'm in the dumps over losing my Super Bowl bet and wondering when/where the LVRocks studio will reconstitute itself.

And then...this oddity lands in my box from the Clark County Desert Conservation Program.

Mojave Max
He’s the West Coast Version of the Groundhog

Today, Feb. 2, many residents across the country celebrate Groundhog Day while West Coast residents begin to look forward to the annual emergence of Mojave Max.

Mojave Max is a live tortoise. Like Punxsutawney Phil, the famous groundhog, Mojave Max’s response to weather signifies when spring will arrive in Southern Nevada. Like all desert tortoises, Mojave Max goes to sleep in October or November of each year. He sleeps for five or six months and then emerges sometime in the spring, signaling the beginning of the season.

To increase interest and excitement in this event, Clark County hosts the annual Mojave Max Emergence Contest. This contest encourages students to study the behavior of desert tortoises and guess when Mojave Max will first exit his burrow each year. Mojave Max usually emerges in March, but has emerged as early as Feb.14, and as late as Apr. 14, in past years.

Temperature, daylight, and an internal clock are the three critical factors that determine when Mojave Max will first exit his burrow each year. The Clark County student who guesses closest to the actual time of Mojave Max’s emergence and their entire class will receive medals, t-shirts, a pizza party, and a field trip to Red Rock National Conservation Area.

For more information and contest entry log on to www.accessclarkcounty.com or www.mojavemax.com.

OK. Now, I'm all for desert conservation and teaching the young 'uns about animals. But there are a few problems with this:

1. What "season" is Mojave Max predicting? That it's going to get hot? We need a turtle for this?

2. I've been living here on and off for 12 years. I've never "looked forward" to Mojave Max waking from his slumber. Have any of you? And by "you" I mean anyone reading in the entire West Coast, according to this press release.

3. If this is a science lesson and not a lesson in mythology, then the kiddies ought to be told that Punxsutawney Phil is a fraud and, while an entertaining diversion, is not actually a scientific predictor of any weather patterns whatsoever. Also, the Tooth Fairy is usually your mom.

4. Las Vegas has so much. The Super Bowl. March Madness. New Year's Eve. Big fights. The World Series of Poker. Cirque du Soleil. CES. Manilow. Must we really swoop in and attempt to compete with a pathetic little Pennsylvania village that has just one ridiculous thing to its name? Is that really fair?