NY Post: What NOT Eat in #Vegas

[UPDATE: NYP editor David Landsel responded via Twitter: "Yes, been to ALL the Las Vegas restaurants we recommended this week; took a couple of years!" OK, then.]


The New York Post today chimes in with a brutal travel piece instructing readers where NOT to eat when in Las Vegas. It is interesting for two reasons, (a) for their selections and (b) because very little travel journalism is ever devoted to what to avoid.

I'm a huge fan of travel journalism devoted to what to avoid, especially when it comes to Las Vegas. In fact, I've penned variations of my Vegas' Seven Deadliest Sins piece instructing readers what not to do for the Los Angeles Times and Chicago Tribune more than once, although it's been a while and may be worth revisiting since not seeing Celine Dion is kind of worthless advice these days. But the point is, knowing what to avoid is at least as valuable in Vegas as knowing what to do. Time and money are precious.

This piece accompanies two others also by Post Travel Editor David Landsel and writer Andy Wang, one listing the 10 best Strip restaurants and 21 off-Strip essential bars and restaurants.

Taken together, the three articles represent perhaps the most exhaustive assessment of the Vegas food scene done by outsiders for something other than a guidebook. In fact, I can't quite imagine how they did it, two guys trying out some 41+ places on the sort of expense accounts money-bleeding newspapers have these days. If they actually ate at all of these places, we're talking an assignment that would have run Rupert Murdoch into the tens of thousands of dollars and taken weeks.

That said, the lists at turns are smart and simplistic, spot-on and unfair, pleasing and maddening. Which is how such lists always are and must be. In some spots, I was incredibly gratified to have my own long-held views affirmed, which may explain my respect.

For instance, I cannot bear all the raves that Thomas Keller's Bouchon at Venetian receives. The Review-Journal's Heidi Knapp Rinella, for instance, put it No. 7 on her best-of list for 2009, which makes me wonder if maybe she's not putting the food in the correct orifice. I have repeatedly said the Bouchon experience is ruined by a totally obnoxious and incompetent waitstaff -- and I've tried more than once to give them the benefit of the doubt that I had been there on an off day or two -- so imagine how delighted I was to see that borne out by the Posters: "What they forgot: A staff that doesn’t drop the ball all the time. Talk about wasted opportunities."

Bouchon was No. 3 on the DON'T-EAT list, which was topped by Guy Savoy, which I haven't visited in years and, thus, have no opinion other than that such travel pieces are worthless if they don't show the courage of going after big names. In this case, they've dressed down a Michelin-rated place perhaps because of its honors and the huge pricetag. No. 2 was Rao's for the same reason that got me in so much trouble with the Caesars Palace flak many moons ago, a complaint that the ambiance is completely uninteresting and the food is very good but not as good as the New York original and also kinda pricey.

I have issues with the rest of the DON'T-EAT list, though. The spanking for tourist-trappy No. 7 Tao is well-deserved, but I've enjoyed terrific meals at Wazuzu at Encore (No. 6) and a dismissal of "anything by Wolfgang Puck" (No. 9) is just a cheap shot. Cut, for instance, is an outstanding steakhouse and I've eaten better food for less money at Spago at Caesars Palace than at the original in L.A. Also, dismissing "anything at Mandalay Bay" (No. 8) shows an ignorance of Rick Moonen's mastery at RM. They didn't mean it anyway, seeing how the write-up actually sort of recommended two places there -- Fleur de Lys and Aureole.

Their BEST-OF list is topped by Bartolotta at Wynn, a home run of a choice. In fact, their lovefest for all things Wynn is spot-on: Wing Lei is No. 6, Alex is No. 7 and SW Steakhouse is No. 10. I'm a little surprised that Botero didn't rate and I'm sure Heidi Knapp Rinella will be shocked that the Posters weren't taken in at Switch (her No. 1 for 2009!?!) by all the diners who cheer as if to say, as Miles loves to mock, "Holy shit! Did you see what just happened to the fucking curtains?"

A big surprise of their BEST-OF is the presence of three CityCenter options, Sage at Aria (No. 2), Bar Masa/Shaboo at Aria (No. 4) and Twist at Mandarin Oriental (No. 8). Having not yet had the chance to eat-around at CityCenter, I'm now more excited than I initially was when I saw so few new-to-Vegas names list of chefs there. It seemed CityCenter was happy allowing Bellagio chefs to franchise. Yet what ones MGM Mirage did recruit - save for whoever's in the kitchen at Beso (No. 10 on the Posters' DON'T-EAT list) -- are doing good work.

Landsel and Wang's Off-Strip Essentials were fun, although several were groaningly predictable -- Lindo Michoacan, Raku, Lotus of Siam, Rosemary's and Luv-It Frozen Custard among them -- and the Peppermill is both predictable and ON the Strip. How odd, too, to recommend the Mount Charleston Lodge, which has perennially had dreadful food. The Posters seem to agree: "The food is a pedestrian disappointment; good thing there’s nothing ordinary about the setting of this hotel restaurant, high above the desert floor on the slopes of Mount Charleston." They're not recommending the restaurant, they're recommending the mountain. So why is this taking up valuable real estate on a best-of food list?

That said, the list did acknowledge the growing supremacy of Vegas as a place to eat really wonderful, varied and authentic Asian cuisine. I'm sure many of their Chinatown choices were solid -- KJ Kitchen, Tofu Hut, Raku, Archi's Thai Kitchen -- and what's telling is that I could take them to four equally amazing holes-in-the-wall over there.

All in all, though, a very respectful and broad assessment of the Vegas food scene. I could quibble all day long -- there's not a single recommendation for Caesars Palace or any Harrah's restaurant and the BEST-OF list fails to unearth any uncelebrated gems like Woo or Koi while veering towards the ultra-expensive -- but these are Landsel and Wang's opinions and by and large they back them up well.

Nicely done.

Wynns Divorcing?

The New York Post is reporting this morning that Steve and Elaine Wynn are divorcing because he has fallen for a British woman in her 40s. This news comes days after Mr. Wynn turned 67 at a gala put on by Elaine. It seems they've remained friendly. They're also still in business together; Elaine is on the Wynn board. Not to mention, Elaine's nephew, Andrew Pascal, is the president and COO of Wynn Las Vegas LLC.

Not sure there's anything more to say about it. I've already turned down a major gossip publication asking me to dig deeper into the identity of the woman. It's not my kind of journalism, so I won't be doing that.

Travel Mag Ed Who Hates Vegas Quits

I'm pleased to report that Erik Torkells, editor-in-chief of Budget Travel for the past several years, is quitting. The New York Post says he was essentially being pushed out by a "corporate restructuring." Jossip has some interesting recent history.

Why should you care? Torkells was the genius who, as editor of perhaps the nation's most important bargain travel publication, went on the mag's blog three months ago to bravely declare of his own readers' favorite city: "I hate Las Vegas. There -- I said it."

It seems Torkells had seen ads for the Wynn in Bon Appetit and thought the "newish" -- 3 years old is new? -- resort looked tacky. Had he ever set foot in the place? Eaten at its Michelin-rated restaurants operated by James Beard-winning chefs? Why, no, of course not.

But, nevertheless, he wrote: At this point, it’s old hat to complain about Vegas being fake, but I looked at the photos in the ad, and I just thought, They look like they’re from a computer game—maybe Grand Theft Auto: Country Club. I don’t want to be anywhere near these places. And I realized that if I never went to Vegas again, I’d be just fine.

Well, that's really an intelligent way for a major magazine editor to draw conclusions, based entirely on photos in an advertisement -- maybe Wynn doesn't advertise in BT? -- and some stereotypes that he admits are "old hat." (Who says "old hat" anymore?)

And, no, as most readers of this blog know, I'm no Vegas or Wynn apologist. In fact, early in Torkells' management, in Nov. 2004, I was not permitted to include anything negative about Las Vegas in my BT piece on the search for Old Las Vegas. I had included a couple of passages about things that folks should NOT do and was told that if it's that bad, just leave it out. That stifling was precisely what gave rise to my piece for the Los Angeles Times on Vegas' Seven Deadliest Sins, my sense that telling people what not to do is at least as valuable in a place of infinite choices like Las Vegas. And I took the Wynn to task for several deficiencies in my punishing Chicago Tribune assessment of the joint when the "newish" resort opened in 2005.

Maybe next Torkells will turn up at The New Yorker and bravely declare, "I'm bored with Iraq. There -- I said it." Or he can find himself at US Weekly and bravely declare, "I don't care about Angelina Jolie. There -- I said it."

Either way, hopefully this demarcates a new era for Budget Travel, which was once piloted by the venerable Arthur Frommer. Frommer, by the way, loved Las Vegas. Too bad he was a bit daft by the end of his tenure. But that's not Vegas' fault. Or is it?

Holy Crap. Cindy Adams Is A Disaster.

Cindy Adams is one of the grande dames of New York gossipland. She's also, so it seems, a total idiot.

Monday's New York Post column proves this. She inexplicably waded into a long blather about Vegas and Macau, behaving as though she alone has unearthed and is breaking this little trend. And the list of errors in her screed are so freaking bizarre that it's a wonder anyone would ever publish her work ever again.

To wit...let's take it apart, shall we? She's in red.

China - which practically owns our paper, our finance, our debt, our businesses, our manufacturing - also owns all our money. Where's this planet's biggest gaming (the new politically correct word) operation? Macao. A 20-minute helicopter ride from Hong Kong or a slightly longer hydrofoil schlep through the South China Sea, this former Portuguese colony was a rathole 20 years ago with a junky casino owned by a man named Stanley Ho. I met him. I was there. I know.

First off, I am sooooo tired of people thinking they're clever mocking the use of the word "gaming" as a euphenism for gambling as if (a) they believe the gamers think they're fooling anyone and (b) it's something new. The word "gaming" has been in use to refer to playing games of chance for more than a century, according to one of UNLV prof Dave Schwartz' books. And, also, it's odd that she's refer to Ho as owning "a" junky casino. He actually owned several. But, hey, she knows. She was there. Mmmhmm. That's nitpicking, though, and you'll love the next bits.

Fast-forward. It's now 28 multimillion-buck five-star hotels like the Phoenician, Wynn's Macao, with all the bells and whistles - butlers, famous chef restaurants, shops such as Chanel, Dior, Vuitton. Five new properties in 14 months.

Unless I'm insane -- and the MacauTripping.Com folks can correct me -- there are absolutely NOT 28 five-star hotels on Macau. I mean, I don't think anyone's actually RATED any of them, but even if we were being overly exuberant and optimistic, TWENTY EIGHT??? Frankly, I'd be surprised if there were even 28 hotels. Also, I thought as I read this, who owns the Phoenician? Maybe it's something I'd not noticed before? We get back to that. Hang tight.

By 2010, visitors will number 35 million per year. Koreans, Japanese, Chinese, Malayans, Indians, Indonesians, Thais, Singaporeans, Cambodians, Laotians, 1.4 billion people within 31/2 hours flying time, and it's a gambling culture. Baccarat, not craps, the main game. They are very focussed. Unlike America, Asia has no gambling stigma. Not so much skill as karma, luck and personal superstitions. They bet millions. Last year's revenues - in US bucks - $10.5 bil.

OK. So she's bouncing off the recent reports of 2007's Macau revenues. Fine. But wait, there's more!

They don't do Vegas. Reason? Airplanes don't allow smoking. To import these "whales," or high rollers, on the docket now is a charter that lets them smoke - and gamble - all the way over. Jurisdiction over the skies is being worked out via video camera that starts at takeoff, so all bets, losses and wins are tallied over recorded airspace.

OK. Now we wander into dumbass fiction insanity. The Asian whales don't "do" Vegas? I sure hope someone told MGM, LVS, Wynn and Harrahs, seeing how they're preparing right now for Chinese New Year, the second-biggest gaming weekend of the year and prime time for Asian whales to descend on the city. (See my New York Times piece on this from last February.)

Think about this logically: The only reason why Asian whales would avoid Vegas on account of non-smoking flights would be if they were flying commercial airlines, and why would millionaire bettors do that? They either take their own private jets or the fly the DOZENS of private planes (usually not charter as the resort companies own these vessels) that the big Vegas guys send over.

As for gaming in the skies, you honestly believe that any company with a Nevada gaming license would risk participating in unsanction gaming as she describes? It's an interesting idea and I imagine someone somewhere is trying to figure out how to make it work, but since nothing's ever come before the Nevada Gaming Control Board, it sounds like a 007 fantasy to me.

And let it be known, whoever steers these high rollers gets a piece of the action. And let it be known, if a favored player loses big, like millions big, there's a giveback. Nobody's saying how much. Take a shot at 5 percent.

This one I dunno. Do publicly traded companies really make shady side deals with customers of this type? I'm dubious.

Steve Wynn is learning to speak Chinese.

Yeah, he mentioned this in my Newsweek piece way back when and tried some words out at a shareholder event, I think, but my impression from chatting with him more recently is that he's dabbling more than "learning."

The Phoenician's Sheldon Adelson is building additional hotels.

SCREECH!!!!!!!!! This is where Cindy flies off the rails. The "Phoenician" turns out to be ... the "Venetian." AND NOBODY FACTCHECKED HER. Or, for that matter, had even a nominal awareness of Vegas. The Venetian is not some little joint, it's one of the most successful and famous Vegas resorts in our history. Adelson built a steroid-sized Venetian Macao, which opened last summer. And this woman, who "knows" because she's "been there," goofs it up because she evidently MISHEARD it. HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!

Whew. OK. I'm better now. Moving on.

MGM is putting up condos. So, these Chinese, who were previously poor Communists, where they getting all this bread? Either they must have really large piggy banks, or some of these piggies know something about the drug culture.

Yes, women pengyou. (That's Mandarin for "my friend.") She just essentially called the entire emerging middle class of China -- a burgeoning group that represents one of the most significant creations of new wealth in modern history -- a drug racket. She just glossed over the fact that the Chinese economy has been rapidly privatizing and expanding at 8-12 percent a year since the late 1980s, that the industrial sector has exploded, that our "outsourcing" has been Asia's "insourcing." No, forget the sophisticated geopolitical and geofinancial explanations for China's growth and diversification. In Cindy Adams' &^**(#-up world, they're all just DRUG LORDS. Oh, and Steve Wynn, Sheldon Adelson and the gang are flying these creeps around the world on private planes because, you know, what's the difference between drug lords and casino kingpins?

These guys who run the operation let no green grow under their feet. They're now organizing portable slots. Take them with you to the can, to bed, to the pool, to who cares. Gamble online.

Sigh. In Vegas, there is expected to be some portable gaming devices, but not in Macau. And it's been slow going moving this along, seeing how I wrote nearly two years ago for Wired that Cantor Gaming was about to start a trial run at the Venetian Las Vegas (or is it Phoenician, Cin?) and it still hasn't happened. The Venetian folks seem indifferent to whether it ever actually does, the MGM Mirage folks have said they don't think it's a necessary amenity. And the Nevada gaming law requires all gambling on whatever devices are to come take place in PUBLIC places. Which eliminates the can or the bed.

And you're worrying about your mortgage?

With morons like you, Cindy Adams, covering gaming matters like this? You kidding me? I'll never go broke.