Guess Who's Coming For Dessert

Actually, one measure of how far O.J. Simpson has fallen is that, even as he faces his first-ever criminal sentencing this morning at the hands of Judge Jackie Glass, few of the major figures from the Trial of the Century are expected. As of Wednesday, the court spokesman said he had not heard from several of the folks whose media careers were birthed in the Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman's pools of blood.

No Greta Van Susteren. No Marcia Clark. No Jeffrey Toobin. No Star Jones. Even Dominick Dunne, my new pal, can't make it, although that's because he continues to ail in New York. But otherwise, this thing is still a bust. A nice payday for me, though. So thanks, Juice. Goldman's father and sister are expected, however.

As we roll into this, though, I'm puzzled by the R-J's willingness to play up dramatic comments by fame-seeking Vegas attorney James "Bucky" Buchanan that O.J. will probably die in prison over this. In the same breath, Buchanan predicted Simpson will get 11 years.

O.J. is 61. The man is an ox, albeit an ox with some shaky knees. Bad knees don't usually kill a guy, though. He can't live to be 72?

Of course, that assumes his sentence isn't reduced on appeal anyway. The parole board has recommended an 18-year sentence, but everyone involved seems to think that's excessive for a first-time offender whose victims aren't even aggrieved in a low-rent crime in which nobody was physically harmed. Likewise, the defense is asking for six years which they'll never get because, well, this is O.J. So, sure, 11-15 years is what my own legal experts told me for my Agence France Presse piece this week. And from there, who knows what happens.

But even at 15 years, is it likely he's going to jail for life, actuary tables being what they are these days? And, if not, does ol' Bucky's prediction belong in a headline?!?