Monday, April 23, 2007

A Topsy-Turvy World

A few things on my mind today...

* Saturday's Review-Journal wrote this at the end of an editorial about a prominent congressman: "Three cheers for XXX. Now, if only 300 more members of Congress shared his line of thinking..." To whom, pray tell, does one of the most conservative newspaper editorial pages in the nation refer? You'll never believe it. I'll keep you in suspense for a few minutes while we ponder a few other things.

* Dear Abby on Saturday was asked by a Eugene, Ore., woman what to do about her garrulous mother-in-law who visits two weeks a year and never, ever shuts up. Does she recommend the hapless woman get her spineless husband to tell his mother to stuff it? Does she suggest perhaps they engage in activities such as the theater or a day at the spa that might give the battleax a hint she should zip the trap? Perhaps Abby (aka Jeanne Phillips) thinks the woman's best hope is to lock the miserable old bat in a closet? No! Abby's answer is thus: "Because her visits are so stressful, ask your doctor for advice on how to alleviate the stress." Translation: "Beats me. Go get yourself a fistful of Xanax. I think I'll have one right now, in fact!" Time was when Dear Abby was criticized for always shunting troubled writers off to therapy. New approach: Pimp for Pfizer.

* I rode the Las Vegas Monofail last week (at $1 a ride because I have a Nevada ID, something they do not promote and have nowhere on their website so far as I can tell, fyi) and was alarmed by how fictitious the stop legend was about what hotel-casinos are accessible. For example, in some cases it suggests the Wynn, New Frontier, Bellagio and Venetian are "accessible," even though they're not on the rail line and require epic walks. Especially specious is the suggestion that the Aladdin/Planet Hollywood (it still says Aladdin, understandably) is "accessible" from the Paris-Bally's stop. That's outrageous since it's one of the monofail's biggest teases; even though you can almost spit on the A/PH doors from the P-B stop platform, you are forced to trek through the circuitous Paris, out to the Strip and then into the front of the A/PH to get there. I get that A/PH didn't pay to be on the route and P-B put a substantial investment in the project, but then just leave them off the signage. Unsuspecting tourists really would think from the legend that these are reasonable walks. Anything that requires more than about a half-mile walk ought not be included.

* A sidebar to a Las Vegas Sun story by Sam Skolnik today on an Orthodox Jewish cop who isn't allowed to wear a beard or yarmulke indicates that the Los Angeles Police Department "also bans beards ... excet in cases of medical necessity." Who here has any idea what sort of medical necessity would require a beard? An allergy to shaving cream?

* The praiseworthy congressman? BARNEY FRANK. Yep. Probably one of the most liberal - and openly gay! But Barney earns praise nonetheless for wanting to toss out the legislation that essentially banned Internet gambling in America and to free up Americans to flush their money down whatever toilet they see fit. What's more, the Review-Journal notes that the law amounts to protectionism for the major U.S. casino companies, keeping people from spending their gambling money on off-shore sites so they can spend it right here. But wait! Aren't those the same big casino companies that drive the Vegas economy and fill up untold ad pages in the newspaper? That's pretty daring -- and consistent. And principled. Scary, huh?


Dan Kane in Vegas said...

i've thought about it for a while now and i canNOT think of a reason why a beard would be a medical necessity. To cover a scar? or a rash?